...The last part of my dream I remember was making a circle. In the dream, I was astrally seeing the circle's boundary and then shoveling quartz crystals into the boundary. The crystals would “prefer” the boundary (like weak magnets preferring iron). The more crystals I set in the boundary the more strongly they would hold there when added.
...and then my alarm went off.
I woke up to a Ghost standing in the wall above my head. She wasn't a pretty ghost. She had a clearly desiccated face and her arms and hands were bent in front of her like she was stuck doing a poor T-Rex impression. It took me a moment to figure out that was what her body probably looked like in the coffin now.
I've never encountered a ghost who linked to their post-death body this much. Usually they are a mix of who they saw themselves as, and the emotions/story around them now.
I told her that she didn't have to be bound to that form and worked to help her envision herself as in life. She was still not a beautiful woman; it was like she hid any beauty in being so plain. Eventually I offered to help her cross (wondering why I couldn't get one of her spirit allies to manifest to do this). She accepted.
However, I had a bad experience a decade ago. I went ghost hunting and a spirit tricked me into thinking it was a helpless lost ghost. A couple days before then I had read about a shaman journey technique where the shaman would cut a circle around himself before he stepped out of his body. Then he would wait inside the circle for a spirit guide to instruct and guide him.
I did this technique in the past and after stepping out of my body the spirit I was dealing with looked incredibly different. It was much more powerful, scarier and obviously more than one spirit, but I was ignorant and arrogantly foolish so I proceeded to continue... Coyote saved my life.
There he was on the other side of the circle, Coyote god of tricksters, and he had one thing to say to me. “Get the FUCK back into your body. You are NOT ready to handle that thing. It eats foolish men like you.”
Now, there is more to that story, but this is all I need to share to be relevant here. Back to this morning. I often just project out lately. I have a lot more experience, and I tend to 2-headed project (where I leave some of myself behind as a small fraction of myself leaves). Today however I felt like I needed to go old school. I cut the circle around myself (I actually had a hard time doing it) and made sure everything was solid before I stepped out of my body. Again I immediately saw a major change. I wasn't dealing with a single Ghost, I was dealing with a projection from a “Legion.”
Reality is fractal. Just as humans and animals are collections of organs comprised of cells which often don't even hold our own DNA (beneficial bacteria), a Legion is a a group of ghosts and spirits all part of a single collective entity with a core drive. Since my third eye saw them is a pack of zombies radiating fear of death and helplessness against it, that was likely their binding focus.
Despite my memories of the past, a decade has gone by. I have learned a lot and become a much more competent shaman. I checked around for my guide and there he was in his canine form with the message I half expected. “It's past time. You are ready now. Get out there and deal with this.”
I stepped through and the horde immediately engulfed me. I have trained with teachers on the astral for this entire time. I've learned to balance being involved in stories and how to partially disconnect from them. Plus, the two headed nature of my projection helped a lot here. No matter how much they projected fear of death and helplessness, I had a root of myself safe in my circle. I started with elemental attacks using shadow to end what needed to end, light to bring empowerment, creativity and hope, fire to bring transformation, air to bring communication, water for emotional healing and self-boundaries and finally ice to negate what isn't needful and bring out the core self.
The legion didn't look so legion anymore. Now it was looking like a mess of ghosts, held by spirits and emotions. So I went one further. I cut a circle around the whole property and declared that within this circle all spirits which had never had a human body were banished. Suddenly the legion was a collection of ghosts whose similarities were less powerful than their differences... and they started to move away from each other.
I called to their spirit allies and sent empowerment. This time I clearly saw their allies come through and begin the process of helping most of them cross, but there was one man in particular who didn't have someone come to him. I asked my guide why this was and he told me that this ghost was a Me. The Legion had been attracted to me because of him.
I have encountered a living version of me: part of my soul group/higher-self/whatever who is alive in another body. We recognized myself quickly, and we spent time sharing how we made different life choices and what we learned from them. Now my guide was telling me that this was a dead version of me.
I went to him and asked him if he was ready to cross. GOM (Ghost-Other-Me) was terrified. GOM believed that he didn't have goodness waiting on the other side and wanted to stay here to avoid the risk of “hell.” I told GOM I could take him to the entrance to the Christian Heaven, and we could see if he would be accepted. He agreed to do so.
So I shifted us there. Think of it like reaching for where you want to be and then dragging yourself to it. I've done it enough that it's graceful, like very fast and easy travel. Standing in front of us was the cliché look so many people expect. Bright white, people's expectations of clouds fazing in and out, gold, light... so much light. And Christ. He was standing there greeting us.
Christ smiled at us and said very different things to GOM and me at the same time. To me there was a greeting related to my work with him. To GOM there was a ritual process that he needed.
Telepathy has concepts, perspective and emotions which are hard to put into writing because you end up writing in a voice very different from the thought voice. Please forgive my poorly translated thought-speak.
Christ greeted GOM, “Do you belong here?”
GOM (Ghost-Other-Me) answered: “No (I wish I did, but I don't feel worthy).”
Christ asked, “Did you love God with all your heart?”
GOM answered shamefully: “No.”
Christ asked, “Did you love your neighbor as yourself?”
GOM started crying as he remembered choosing to hurt others by being selfish, “No.” We shared in his remembering. I felt his pride, fear and anger in one of the memories. I understood why he chose not to help in another.
Then Christ said something I didn't expect. “I accept your confession.”
I started crying. I was watching a man do a life review with a loving God who was helping him release his pain and loss so he could accept joy and peace. When Christ asked “Do you have anything else you wish to confess?” it was time to return and I knew it.
Before I left Christ projected to me, “I know you have chosen another afterlife, but if you come you aren't stuck here. Come visit once in a while.”
That was powerful for me. You see, my family is very specific that the Bible is the only source of all truth and there is an interpretation they hold firmly. As I walked my Magickal Journey, my perspective of Christ and God was transforming into something so different from their interpretation and some of the verses, that I felt like I had to let go of my “Christianity.” I thus become a bit of a spiritual wanderer.
Recently my teacher in Ifa moved away and I have been hearing a calling to study Hispanic and Christian Magick. While he was here my teacher grounded all of my practices into the context of traditional Africa as he experienced it. Now that he is gone, I have these roots and teaching he gave me, and have to learn to apply them and everything else I've learned to my current context as a practicing priest.
My family roots are in Christianity. Despite my parents disapproval and my community's avoidance of Christianity, I love Christ and go to him as a teacher on a regular basis. I have a confusion with a Biblical “God the Father” due to a rather nasty experience, but even that isn't insurmountable as I have a context to connect in a healthy way.
I left Ghost-other-Me to his life review and returned to my body. I checked to make sure there were no other spirits in the area (there were, but I don't need to tell you that story) and then I returned to myself and got up to write this all down...
so... Good Morning. :-)